General Life Whatnot – Page 4

October 15, 2014October 15, 2014Feminism General Life Whatnot Possibly Sort of Ranty

The Real and True Me

I’m changing my name back. I know. After all the the serious thought, hemming and hawing I put into the decision to become Natalie Burg Vial, I picked the wrong choice. I was just wrong. I tried it on, and it didn’t fit.

I have been annoyed at every piece of mail that has come addressed to Natalie Vial. I roll my eyes at the people in my doctor’s office who look up my file and say, “Oh, Natalie Burg Vial?” Which is insane, because the only reason they have me filed that way is because I told them that was my name. But it feels wrong. It feels like a lie. It’s not romantic or sweet. Every time I hear myself referred too by the (actually rather cool) last name of my (wonderful and loving) husband, I feel the crushing weight of thousands of years of patriarchy grind on my bones.

October 10, 2014October 9, 2014General Life Whatnot

Something New

It’s not that I’m surprised at being the youngest person in my water aerobics class. I was taken aback, however, when I realized on my first day there, that had she come with me, my mother would have been the youngest one there. The fact that I had somehow signed up for an exercise class that was clearly for elderly women was so absurd to me that during the first twenty minutes of that initial session, it was all I could do to resist bursting into giggles. I bit the inside of my lips. I closed my eyes and did yoga breathing. And I made it. I did not collapse into laughter. I honestly wasn’t sure if I could go back a second time though. What were the odds that I could keep it together twice?

September 19, 2014September 19, 2014General Life Whatnot Self-Employment

Is freelancing a real career? Here’s 1,423 square feet and a half acre of “yes.”

We are buying a house today. My freelance writer self and independent musician husband have an appointment to close at 10am, after which we will move into our adorable 1938, 4-bedroom Cape Cod with detached two-car garage and a half-acre of land.

When I quit my job, back in 2010, I was working for a board, and therefore had to go around to ten different people, all of them at least 20 years my senior, to tell them I was not only leaving my position as their director, but I was doing so to work for myself, as a writer. They were all very kind and supportive, and, I could also tell, quietly concerned. I was trading a secure, public sector job with great benefits for what appeared to be essentially a non-job – in a terrible economy. They all liked me and wanted me to succeed, but I could see that they couldn’t visualize how “freelance writer” and “success” had any potential to overlap. When my then-fiancé followed suit the next year, leaving his high school teaching job after eight years, we only seemed crazier.